Update Two:
I REALLY HATE FLYING! My plane is scheduled to leave Orlando at 10:30 and I had to wait until 9:30 for the the bag check to open only to be told...
That I'm not really flying the airline that is on my ticket but United instead... I asked them I was supposed to know this if my ticket said #######.... They tell me because of the flight number...
So then I run across Orlando International to the other side and wait line, my mind conscious of the clock. 9:45.... Waiting.... 9:50... Waiting. Finally my turn comes and I load the bags to be checked. The lady asks for 50 dollars to check the bags!?!?
I show her the paperwork that came with my original tickets that shows that ###### Airlines said my bags where included. She shrugs and says I can pay or leave the bags. I pay, not enough time to argue.
Through security... 9:55.... 10:00... T-minus 5 and counting.....
Security goes fine until they decide to check my lab top then give me a hard time about having fruit juice in my carry on bag... I explain to the person that I am Type Diabetic and that I need that juice, he doesn't speak English...
Finally after a volley of kind words between the security manager and myself I am on the tram heading for the gates... T-minus 3, we have ignition...
My gate, of course, is the furthest one away. I break into full stride running to the end, fearing that boarding has ended. I round the corner and find a huge group of people, moaning and complaining. I hear a voice over the intercom, "Flight XYZ, bound for ########, will begin boarding shortly. We have LOST A CREW MEMBER and will begin boarding as soon as they ARE FOUND. Thank you for flying United."
I don't know who this crew member is or what they do but I can only thank them for getting lost (whatever that means).
Once aboard the plane I am wedged between two stately (read: fat) women who both decide that all arm rests belong to them. I try to free my labtop from the confines, but do not have room. Instead I am stuck, looking foward, pinned in cellulite hell.