Thanks for all the info guys. My main reason not to want to buy a polisher is not to risk doing something harmful to the finish while I'm learning how to use it. I think for this car I'll pay someone to get it good and then I'll just keep it nice as I have all of my cars (funny how it seems like you can never find a used car in quite as nice condition as it would be if you owned it the whole time).
What about if I change my question to be more localized, like after wet sanding out a small scratch? The 3M Rubbing Compound gets out the sanding marks, but then the 3M swirl mark remover seems to do very little (or perhaps it leaves behind it's own fine scratches), and the 3M Hand Glaze does nothing at all as far as I can tell (I now use P21S Paintwork Cleanser where I would have used the Hand Glaze before, i.e. just to get out contaminants). I try to avoid Meguiar's ever since I watched their wheel cleaner strip the paint off my wheels and bleach the driveway below the wheel. Maybe all the other products are good, but just out of spite I don't like to buy their products after that (even though I'll admit a good body shop where I used to live told me they tested a bunch of different products and the Meguiar's Professional line was as good or better than anything else).
EDIT: I've been reading some of the links. I'm starting to think my real problem with the products I already use isn't the product, but that I use a towel to apply it. Time to research pads...
I'm going to take a little different opinion here. The hand can be quite (overly) aggressive. Sure it's near impossible to correct a modern clear coat car completely by hand for normal people.
But, compounds used by hand, in certain situations will remove a lot of clear coat (material). What your going after (want) is uniform material removal. This is predicable and reproducible with a DA.
By hand, there will be certain positions that are more comfortable, where you will be over removing clear coat, and certain positions that will be less comfortable - where you will be under removing.
It's not too hard to put "finger marks" in paint by being overly aggressive with compounds by hand. In this respect, the DA is actually safer than the hand, because it provides uniform downward pressure and uniform/predictable/reproducible material removal.
Seriously, we've all been through it here. Buy a DA or just live with the finish.
Can you find me a single thread on a detailing forum where someone said a DA Screwed Up My Paint???
You can pay a pro - but it won't beat the satisfaction and the learning experience of doing it yourself. Plus - buying all the stuff is cheaper than paying a pro and you will have it for future use.
Meg's stuff is pretty good. If you damaged a wheel using Wheel Brite - you didn't read the directions. That being said, I'd stick to boutique brands (Wolfgang, BlackFire, Menzerna, etc..) to start. They will be easier to use (compared to Megs Professional line).
As for microfiber towels, they are the correct thing to use. If they are picking up all sorts of stuff - the car is not clean, the towel is not clean, or you are not storing them correctly. We are all using them successfully. They "pick up stuff" - because they excel at picking up dirt on paint. Cotton is a dinosaur. It's time to adapt to high quality microfiber. Learn about microfiber and how to clean and store it. It's not too difficult - and you will get better results with microfiber.