Tragedy in the Fuzzard family...

The Fuzz

The Fuzz

New member
It has been a long and hard weekend for my family. My father James retired some number of years ago and has been fine just working at home. After a few years of relaxing he felt the need to reenter the workforce so he took a job at an oil refinery. While preparing for his first day on the job there was a terrible accident. He was on his way downtown to get his mustache trimmed and a shave. The shop is on the corner of a relatively busy intersection. A semi-truck blew through a red light and plowed right into the parking lot of the complex my father was parked in.

The police informed my mother on Saturday morning that my father had been involved in the accident. Apparantly the noise of the wreck startled the barber as he had scisors in hand and he accidently clipped my dad's mullet. Then my dad came in the door a clean cut gentleman and told mom that his car just got landed on by a Budwiser truck and it was time to go out shopping for a new one. Apparantly there was alcohol involved and Budwiser's attorneys were very accomodating. Needless to say, my father doesn't need to take the job at the refinery anymore.

So that is the tragedy. We have one less mullet in the Fuzzard family. What is the world coming to???
 
Fuzz,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss, words fail me !!! :no:
:emlaugh: :lol: :redface: :ermm: :stuart: :p :wacko: :angel_not :down: :naughtyD :shifty: :ohmy:

Norah


PS - Thanks for adding to the smiley collection ;)
 
yeah, somehow we will survive. It has been a weekend of mourning for the loss of the mullet though...










By the way, other than Dad chopping off his mullet, the rest of the story is about as real as affirmative action every changing the lineup of the NBA.
 
Did you have a wake for it?? :gathering

Perhaps until it grows back, he could try wearing one of these :canadian: ??
 
When will the services be held?
Are you going to have the mullet burried or cremated and scattered across the beaches.

My deepest sympathies to you and your families loss

"J"
 
Wait, I'm confused...

Didn't anyone think to save the trimmings from the mishap to the mullet? Surely mullet glue could have been applied and the mullet salvaged no?

Still, perhaps the shock of the moment was too much. Such things can do strange things to a person's thinking.

Glad to hear everyone is pulling together to pull through this trying and difficult time.
 
Thank you all for your concern. A memorial paypal fund has been setup at RememberTheMullet@gmail.com if you feel moved to donate. Unfortunatly, in the confusion the mighty mullet was mixed in with other clippings from the day's cuts. They were impossible to sort through to retrieve what was left of his luxurious locks. A memorial service will be held at the Hooters on the north end of Sarasota tomorrow night at 7:00 PM. In lieu of flowers please tip your waitresses. My family appreciates your concern. I have passed on your sentiments to my father and he said to rock on. What a trooper... Such an example to us all in the face of horrible disfigurment. I know that time will heal his wounds, but it won't ever bring back the smoothness he is going to miss out on between now and then.
 
so sorry for you loss:ohmy: you should buy him a wig like this untill his mullet grows back

landscaper.jpg


or this


trash.gif



Jeff
 
Did your father belong to a mullet donor organization? Perhaps some of the hair can be salvaged and donated to poor balding men?
 
Sadly my father chose not to be a donor. He is on the donor list right now though for a transplant. Unfortunately mullets aren't easy to transfer and the body usually rejects them when medical science has tried. Still... It is worth the risk to return to smoothness.
 
The Fuzz said:
Sadly my father chose not to be a donor. He is on the donor list right now though for a transplant. Unfortunately mullets aren't easy to transfer and the body usually rejects them when medical science has tried. Still... It is worth the risk to return to smoothness.
Click to expand...

I wish your father a quick recovery and pray that he gets out of the ICU Ward at the Hair Club for Men soon.

This must also be an economic blow to the area hair-care industry, I wish them the best also.
 
keeotee said:
This kind of tragedy... well, was FEMA involved?
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Jngrbrdman said:
FEMA as in the Federal Enforcement of Mullets in America? :lol:
Click to expand...

No, not FEMA. My 'sources' tell me S.M.O.O.T.H. (Studly Men Of Outstandingly Thick Hair) are investigating the incident. :bb:
 
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