Sounds like you're in over your head on the dealer account, but it's always your best option to talk directly with the man in charge at the dealership and be straight up with him. You really appreciate the steady work and atmosphere at the dealership, but are having to turn down higher paying jobs to continue offering them that service. You have no other choice than to either charge more for your recon work (or do less) or drop the account entirely. If you have a good working relationship with them, they may be willing to work with you on pricing or process.
It sounds to me like you are doing a LOT more than you need to for the money. If that is what the dealer is expecting, then you need to ask for more money. Put yourself in the dealer's shoes for a minute. If you were risking losing your detailer sub-contractor because you aren't paying him enough, would you rather pay a little more for the work or have to find a new detailer to take care of all the recon work? Given how you view the "other" detailers around this may be an easy scenario for you.
It sounds to me like you are doing a LOT more than you need to for the money. If that is what the dealer is expecting, then you need to ask for more money. Put yourself in the dealer's shoes for a minute. If you were risking losing your detailer sub-contractor because you aren't paying him enough, would you rather pay a little more for the work or have to find a new detailer to take care of all the recon work? Given how you view the "other" detailers around this may be an easy scenario for you.