Clean Jokes: Only

How to prove that a dog is mans best friend

Lock your dog and your wife in the trunk of your car for two hours. When you unlock the trunk, notice which one is happy to see you!
 
A new favorite....
traveling salesman walks down a residential street...rings the first doorbell. A 5 yr old boy opens the door..he's got a cigarette hanging out of his mouth and a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand. The salesman's taken aback...asks "little boy...is your mother or father at home"? Boy pulls the cig out of his mouth..exhales smoke and says, "what the hell do YOU think"?
 
A guy hears a knock on his door. He opens the door and no one is there. He looks down and sees a snail on the porch. He picks it up and tosses the snail across the yard.

two years later....
The guy hears a knock on the door. He opens it and the snail says "what the heck what that for?!
 
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