BEWARE: Cat Scratch Fever on the ride

Tralfaz

Tralfaz

Chemically dependent
BEWARE:Cat scratch fever on the ride!!!

ALSO BEWARE this post was removed quickley and without any warning or notification from the wonderful moderators at AUTOPIA (home of the free speech)

So the morning was going along really well. Enjoying my girlfriends company before having to take her to the airport this morning.
She asked if I could polish one of her rings before she left so I proceeded to the garage, more like an auto detail warehouse, to get some Klasse AIO, it seems to shine up her jewelry really nice.

I'm walking past my 911 admiring how shiny and pretty I keep it up when I notice something that looks like smudge marks on the top of the front right fender. From a distance it just looked like some minor handprints, no biggie. I grabbed the Klasse and proceeded to further examine the debris

I'm like what the ****:( this is not smudge marks but frigging fine scrathces, some more than fine, that look like something got drug across my car. These were not here on Sunday when I QD my car and the car has not left the garage since.
I was at work all day yesterday(Monday), she on the other hand was at the house all day doing yard work and refilling all the planters with new flowers. REACTION = PISSED:mad:

I proceed to move at the speed of sound into the house trying all the while to act very calmly. Women have a sense of knowing when your really pissed before you even know it yourself.

So I ask very calmly if she used the car yesterday. "No", very sweet and calmly she replies, almost sounded too nice I'm thinking. I wanted it to sound more guilty so I could have justification of going off like some crazed cleanaholic on speed.

No biggie if she drives the car, I kinda like it because I think other people get more enjoyment out of the fruits of our labor than us most of the time. Kinda like people cooking for you.

"So did you accidently frigging drag, bump, smash, rub, throw, fire, drop anything on the car "(okay I couldn't take it anymore)
Don't worry she knows my programming and takes it very well.
Again she replies in that sweet voice like a mother calming a child, "No baby, let's go see what's wrong with your car"

Damn rights where gonna go look at the car.

I'm ready to flipping explode and I get this beautiful, all dolled up, calming, female, talking to me like she's singing me a lullaby making me feel more like the dope I am.

I have already convicted her, she is guilty, I know it, I just have to stay calm and find a way to extract the information from her without my face glowing like a red hot meteor exposing my anger.

"Here, see this, here, right here, how can you miss that, it goes from here to here and it looks to me like something got drug across this fender, this was not here yesterday", you get what I'm saying. More like tell me what you did to my car.
No matter how hot you look standing there pretending you don't know what happened I'm not gonna let this thing go until I get the truth.

Then comes "THE CRUSHING BLOW", she begins to examine the scratches closely, probably better than I did (remember I already had a prime suspect, the princess herself), she then turns to me and says "honey, these are animal claw marks, a squirrel or cat must have jumped on this fender and with how polished and waxed you keep the car they couldn't get enough traction and slid back off, see here you could see them clawing down the side of the fender trying to hang on, the poor little guy didn't expect it to be so slippery"

So there Mr. Bozo stood in all his glory with nothing much to say.

"Mmh" I responded casually without showing too much emotion. I was ready to interrogate, get to the real truth, sentence her, and now this. Internally I've gone from animal lover to RAMBO!!

Feeling pretty stupid now I keep the pattern consistent.

So it all comes to me now like a bad dream, the garage door was left about a foot ajar last night for a few hours, we don't have a cat I'm thinking, but the neighbors cats are always coming around, and there are also tons of squirrels in the neighborhood.

She now is watching me (all sexy like, why do women have this ability to be so beautiful without even trying), analyzing me, probably wondering what my next idiotic response is going to be, and then it comes, "that's it I'm going to get a BB gun and any dam cat that comes in this frigging yard is going to get some buckshot"

I can only imagine what she thought, look at the poor sap, suffering in this detailing, clean freak, polish everything in the house nightmare. Then she says " honey I love that you care about things so much and that you look after them so well".
Just shoot me now I'm thinking for the moron I am.
Then again thank god this women still loves me!

Tell me something like this hasn't happened to you.

So tonight I will pull out the Naptha cleaner, Menzerna IP, FP, Klasse, etc. and a frigging KEG of BEER and begin anger management.

I will keep you posted.
 
Dude

:wait

Whooh! Dude nice story and glad your 911 means so much to you... I am soo with you on this... But also glad your woman has a true understanding of your detail problem. :beat

Dam man it had to be a cat... looking for a warm hood to chill out on... Thank goodness you had so many coats of Zanio on her that the poor little fellow had nothing to "get a grip" on....:bigups

One word of advice, coming form one who just completed anger management, drink more and it will heal faster...:drool

TC
:-p
 
OUCH! :angry Hope they aren't too deep for you. I am making sure my garage and back door are fully closed.
 
Heh Heh I saw your post on Autopia before it got deleted, I know one of the mods is a cat lover, that's probably why it disappeared so quickly :rolleyes:
 
Interesting that it was deleted from Autopia if the post was as written here.
Even a cat lover shouldn't take exception to what was written.
Absolutely no reference to possibly doing something pretty drastic to the cat to see that it never came near my garage again.
Of course I would never do anything like that, :D, but there are those who might.

Charles
 
CharlesW said:
Interesting that it was deleted from Autopia if the post was as written here.
Even a cat lover shouldn't take exception to what was written.
Absolutely no reference to possibly doing something pretty drastic to the cat to see that it never came near my garage again.
Of course I would never do anything like that, :D, but there are those who might.

Charles
Click to expand...

Feel your pain Tralfaz:wait
 
I know the feeling well. In 97 I had a 320i BMW brough brand new. I lived in the country and only had an old bran to park in with a dirt floor. I would put the car in the barn and in the AM I would come out and there would be a cat sleeping on the hood on the breather. As soon as he seen me he'd run, of course marring the car finish. I had to compound, polish to get them out.

The thing that sent me over the edge was one morning, I came out and it had rained a bit and my car looked like the cat had a party on it. Smear marks and kitty paws prints all over the entire car. up and down both windows, slide, slide marks on the side...I lost it big time.
I won't finish this story but let me just say that when I got done the cat never walked on my car again!

I have a cat now but he won't even walk near the car as I chase himn every time he does.
 
Man that really sucks :mad:

There have been many times where I was ready to let the acusations fly but the culprit and the acuser were one in the same once all the facts were laid out. Thank goodness for anger management, it has been my only consolation a few times!
 
Tralfaz said:
BEWARE:Cat scratch fever on the ride!!!

ALSO BEWARE this post was removed quickley and without any warning or notification from the wonderful moderators at AUTOPIA (home of the free speech)
Click to expand...

Wow yes, I have had them pull my avatars before as well.. I got a mail that said it was offensive... hummm to who? Oh well when you own the joint you can make the rules... I like it here better already so this will be my new haunt! :headbang

TC
:lmfao
 
This site rocks. People here are way cooler. Hope you guys had a good laugh from the story.

So here is the program of events that I went through to get the scratches out

1) Cleaned fender really well with Naptha cleaner, this stuff is great, took all the old wax off like nothing

2) Menzerna IP on a wool pad, yes wool pad, man a couple of passes with this stuff and my little wen orbital and the scratches were gone. Was so happy with the scratches gone I compounded the entire fender with the wool pad and IP.

3) Cleaned entire surface with Naptha cleaner

4) Menzerna FP on yellow foam pad, kept going over fender till I was happy with the shine, also removed all products with wet MF

5) Klasse AIO on white foam pad, this I did a little different, I crank up the speed to 5-6 and try to basically burnish the surface, make sure you use very light pressure and move the pad around alot, put two coats on for good measure. Again removed product with wet MF immediately.

6) Applied Klasse SG next with same yellow pad that I used with the AIO, yes same pad, did not clean it, it not gonna harm anything, try it you'll be amazed, used same high speed, and kept wiping as I went with wet MF. Put only one coat of SG on. I'll put another on over the weekend.

7) RESULTS= You could shave in the reflection, this fender looks better now than when I bought the car. Not one fine scratch, mark, anywhere. The finish is the slickest I have ever produced, I'm telling you bump up the speed on your PC, I have done this before and it works every time. I inspect everything with a 500 watt halogen lamp from every angle.

Absolutely looks so much better than the Zaino I have on the rest of the car. I will be applying Klasse to the entire car now. I will get pics when my buddy Dino has time with his digital. I will try to get some before and after pics of the care as I go over on the weekend. I think I'll try to different parts with different products so we can maybe see the diff. between like Z and Klasse.

The car is Zenith blue in color.
 
Yea people here are more tolerant :band , Have you got a pic of the 911? I'm gonna get one of those before I die:lmfao
 
man that sucks to hear. I would have flipped to. Around here though I wouldn't be going for a BB gun...

Got any pics of her now?
 
Yeah your right........................It'll be cheaper for me to go out and buy the most expensive digital camera..............actually I could probably hire a damn photographer and it would cost me less than the amount of beer you drink when you come over. Why is it that your friends always seem to drink more when the come to your house..................must just be my perception.
It's all good.................wait till I get that kegerator set up in the garage. Now we're talking!
 
Tralfaz - man that was a great story. I woulda' been thinking/doin' the same thing as you were!

Glad you were able to get those scratches taken care. :bigups
 
Here are some pics of the car.
It was Zaino'd approx. 8 months ago, still holding up well, it should for a garage queen.

I'm stripping it down as we speak and will go over it with the Menzerna twins then follow up with the Klasse twins. Will post the after pics.

I would really like to try the Wolfgang stuff but have so much other crap I better use it up.


Click here
 
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That's one of the most beautiful cars made in my opinion. Some day, I'll have one of those!! I LOVE that picture of the rear of the car - nothing can compare!! AWESOME!!!!! Great Color, too.


f8f2c4c5.jpg


Heck, I'd have a tank out there hitting any varmit that tried to crawl onto my hood if that was MY car.
 
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