Over-reacting?

A

Aurora

New member
Yesterday, my GF's van got keyed BAD. :mad: I told her I will get some touch up paint and do what I could.... long story short... she asks what I would do if I caught somebody scratching my paint and she then ran her freakin nail across it. I cursed in spanish and pulled her hand away. She knew I had just spent endless hours polishing the darn thing AND I've told her numerous times how the paint is as soft as butter. She insisted it was not scratched and was about to wipe it again when I warned her to not even touch it. She wanted an apology for my reaction and I refused and will continue to refuse because that was just uncalled for and a straight spit in the face. She's done things like lay boxes ot the roof and drag them across and also wiping dirt off with her hand. That's all understandable and I showed her the aftermath without being mean and she understood. BUT this just really pushed my buttons.

Anybody hear me out there?

Yes, the world is not gonna end because of a scratch... but there's so much more behind it.

Best comparison I could give her was me taking acetone to her toenails after she had just got done painting and me just saying, LIGHTEN UP!

It just ain't right.

Anybody agree?
 
No, I didn't shove her away or anything. It was more the words---Bleeping bleep, why the bleep you do that?
 
You'll have to give in and apologize some time! ;)



I'd be p*ssed too though. My dad and brother are both like that sometimes. My brother put a box on the trunk last weekend and dragged it across the paint. Both of them seem to do that cr*p just to p*ss me off, and for no other particular reason.

I understand that I have accident damage on my car, but I still don't need any more scratches. And since I'll be getting a new car soon, I'll be REALLY p*ssed if they do that stuff to the new car.
 
DanoWatt said:
Maybe, but you can make it sound good by using the term "passionate" instead of "bat**** crazy".



:)
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I take it you've never dedicated a weekend to getting your ride in condition. Might wanna edit the cursing there
 
Hey jroc,



I don't think you overreacted one bit. Pushing her hand away is not a domestic problem. She tried to damage your property and you were protecting what is yours. She is your GF, so nothing bad there.



I would have a serious chat with my GF if she did that. I'm sorry that is uncalled for. You offered to fix her car and you were trying to make her feel better, and she kicks you right in the balls! I would leave the key marks in her car and say sorry I had to spend the time on my car because you decided to run your nails across mine. That is really not cool at all, I know that would never happen with mine so I can't think "well what if". Sorry to hear it jroc, not cool at all.



Take some of her "b-day, anniversary, x-mas" money and buy some new products, and then detail your car again to remove the "nail"marks.:D Really not cool, and if anyone says you are overeacting, I think they are wrong. Now if you hit her, or something like that I could see their argument, but you just bitched her out!
 
It doesn't seem like she was very considerate. Being your girl friend she knows how much you love your car and how well you take of it. She should learn to be careful around it. But to make the peace you may have to say your sorry. Tell her that it seemed like she was hurting you on purpose and thats why you reacted like you did. Good luck with the relationship, Wes
 
Hi jrocc :)

I know how it feels.. just like those who replied, my dad always puts his beer bottles in the trunk area and drags them across. People here always run their fingers when they see my car dirty. :D It's just that some people can't understand why I get pissed, and I make them understand when I make an example using something that I think is meaningful for them.. and if the can't understand what I'm trying to say, then they won't hear an apology from me.

Well in my case if it was my bf who did it, I'll beat him first

:chuckle: jk after getting mad I usually polish again and apologize once it gets fixed :D
 
Tell her that you demand an apology for her putting her screatching nails on your car. Turn the table on her and see where it goes. I would be pissed as hell if my wife did that to our car. As it is, she makes sure not to put her hands on the car unless absolutely necessary.
 
I would have her apologize for running her nails across the car and then I would apolgize for the way I came across. Then I would have a nice long talk with her about respecting each other and each others property. That way for future reference she knows how important it is to you...
 
Everyone close to me knows my obsession. If they taunt with it, I treat their car the same. It doesn't bother me letting my parents cars get so disgusting you don't want to drive em anymore.



However, it has never gotten to that. I try to educate and they respect my work. Sounds like there is no respect here and she could probably pull the "I'm your elder" thing. In the end, you're probably better off letting it go and just not going extreme with the detail the next time...or not at all.
 
She is usually understanding about EVERYTHING, so we'll talk about for sure. She flips out about many things that I find trivial, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna use any of that to belittle her. Man, I sit there for almost an hour while puts on some make-up. I think she looked more beautiful when she went in. I've told her so, but that doesn't change her behavior. That doesn't mean I'm gonna shove her face in soapy water to get it all off her. That is her and this is me. My detailing and maintining takes absolutely no time away from the relationship, so I just do not understand her . It's almost like a jealousy thing. Damn, I'm in the wrong forum. This is more about the relationship than detailing.
 
This is way beyond a case of lightening up. It was absolutely uncalled for for her to scratch the paint. If she knows you at all, she would have some some semblance of a clue of what detailing means to you. Sounds like there is a significant issue if she can't at least respect something important to you.



It seems to me she's way out of line. All the shame falls on her :nono :nono :down



Yes, definitely a realtionship thing. If she reacts this way over a car finish who knows what other kinds of incidents are going to take place down the line. :eek: :nervous: :scared:
 
Bill D said:
If she reacts this way over a car finish who knows what other kinds of incidents are going to take place down the line. :eek: :nervous: :scared:
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Funny thing is she could say that about me and my reaction. :o The point is we autopians got the bug. Our partners should atleast respect that and not work against us. I thought maybe somebody had a similar experience. Not good . Not good.
 
jrocc1212 said:
Funny thing is she could say that about me and my reaction. :o The point is we autopians got the bug. Our partners should atleast respect that and not work against us. I thought maybe somebody had a similar experience. Not good . Not good.
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I don't think she has a valid argument at all since she intentionally went and scratched the paint. Yes, you're absolutely, 100% correct , right on the money about at least having some respect. Not good big time for sure.
 
Sometimes you need to choose your battles. IMHO, this is one that shouldn't be fought. Regardless of your retentiveness towards detailing, this is a very minute issue. The two of you will experience a whole lot worse in your lives, believe me.



Be the bigger person and apologize for blowing the issue out of proportion. After all, if you enjoy detailing so much, it really shouldn't be a problem repair what little damage she caused.
 
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